Asalamu alikum
So why is it that polygyny is always seen in a bad way ...why do we make more of it than it should be ... if indeed we believe in Allah and the prophet saws and we follow the ways of the salaf ... then why is polygyny spoken of badly and why is it not practiced the way need be
Polygyny is often see in a bad way because of the way we go about it ... on one hand you have men wanting this And believe me ALL MEN want polygyny just they dont go about it for one reason or another and if you believe that your man isnt one of them then you need to seek3Allahs help because EVERY MAN does ...anyway the way men go about searching for the next wife doesnt help as alot of men will do this in serect and even once married cant bring themselves to tell their wife/wives and because of this polygyny is seen in the wrong way
Also one of the other reasons are because men arent being men they Allow their wives to rule what is done and how ...this cant be a man needs to take control of his home as this is his responsibility and he will be held accountable for his family as well as himself on the day of judgement when women are let go and allowed to take charge their emotions always get the better of them and this is when the shyatan comes and gets involved ..he places ideas their that arent really their but makes you feel that it is something bigger than it actually is ... so for this reason men need to take the control back and he needs to prove that he is indeed a man and can lead his family to jannah
We also have the idea of polygyny being used as a way to break families up which isnt true ... what is written for each marriage is in fact that it is written ... in coming wives are not their to destroy a family she is their as Allah wrote for her to be their and the man she married is who she was intended to marry the fact is that he is also married to another .... until we allow our hearts and mind to believe in true qadar of Allah then we will always use the blame game and never see the truth behind it all
Asalamu alikum, the last paragraph is so true! Why do people see polygyny as an evil act
ReplyDeletewa Alikum asalaam ...jazak Allah Khair for stopping by and commenting ...allahu as to why ... what i do think is that because all we here about is the bead in polygyny and not the good ...
ReplyDeleteSalaam aleykum,
ReplyDeleteI see it as an evil act because the man makes this choice mostlt alone but it affects his wife greatly. Instead of having her mate/partner/best friend come home each night after she has been waiting all day he now basically tells her, well i do like u, but not enough to spend every day with u. U are not enough for me,but having me around only half (or even less) of the time should be enough for u. Oh and the cowife plus fam also needs money so i am halving your allowance. And have u guys thought about the kids? Daddy loves u but he wants to see u only half of the time whilst he makes more babies wirh another woman the other half of the time. So daddy who is already working much and doesnt get to see u often, will now spend even less time with u. He wont be there every weekend to see u at ur soccor match but only every other weekend at the most
everyone is allowed to feel as they feel but the reality is that their love of Allah both men and women isnt their and untill you completely submit your self to Allah we will continue to think like this
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